Move in day...

So the big day is almost here, for most of you this year it'll be Saturday 7th September although if it's a little later don't worry, you won't miss too much.

You will remember this day. For most of you it's the first time you'll live alone. It may be the first day
of a year that changes everything for you. The picture on the right was me on my move in day, and below it is me at the end (don't worry, you don't have to grow a beard!). A hell of a lot changed in that year. It may also be the first time you've lived anywhere but the house you grew up in (for me it certainly was). And for some of you, you may be about to be left in an entirely different country from the one you grew up in where all the people speak with stranger Shrek accents (okay we don't all sound like that but you get the idea). It may also be the first day of a year that changes everything. The picture on the right was me on my move in day, and below it is me at the end - and the changes were more than in the facial hair department. There's one thing I should say. WELCOME TO ST ANDREWS!!! You may be scared. You may be nervous about living away from home. This is totally normal and I was too despite being familiar with the town already.

Halls will open at 10am on the Saturday but don't feel that you have to be there on the dot. It will be busiest at 10am but I'll be honest that's when I moved in last year (was only almost knocked over by a Mercedes twice!). When you arrive you'll be given your room key (or card) as well as your Matriculation Card (or Student ID).

DO NOT LOSE THIS CARD! YOU WILL BE LOST WITHOUT IT!!

That may sound dramatic but I'm serious. This card is one of the most important things you will own in St Andrews, especially when living in halls. It lets you into your building. It lets you into the Library. It lets you into the Student Union (which is the place to be at night during freshers week). I remember what my warden told us when we arrived at Uni Hall last year.

"This is my matriculation card. There are many like it but this one is mine... Without my matriculation card, I am useless!"

Now Jo may sound a little dramatic as well but I've seen the nightmares that can go on when people lose their matric cards. The only thing I would say is more important than a matric card is a Biometric Residence Permit or BRP Card for international students. That is potentially more important as without it you can't stay in the country but I digress.

Once you've got your room key and your matric card, you can go find your room, there will be people on hand to help you find it, normally committee members or just volunteers from halls. What I'd advise is that you get everything into your room. Unpack anything you really need to unpack now, maybe make your bed up, then leave the rest for later. Move in day is a day that only happens once and halls will be hosting events throughout the day so you now need to do something that may sound cold, and scary, and a bit heartless to be quite honest. You need to SEND YOUR PARENTS HOME. 

You may be thinking "What? Why?" and the answer is simple. The most important thing you can do right now is meet people and if you have your parents hanging over your shoulder all the time it'll be a lot harder to do that. I understand that most will not go home properly (especially if they've come from another country) but they need to leave you alone to meet people and start making friends. Move in day fell on the September holiday weekend for the schools near my home so my parents brought our caravan up to a nearby caravan site for the weekend but once I was moved in, we went for lunch and then they dropped me back at halls for the welcome events and left me alone for most of the weekend. I saw them briefly on the Sunday when they dropped off some stuff for me from the shops and briefly again on the Monday before they headed home but that was the extent of my interaction with my parents on move in weekend and I think it was the perfect amount. Don't let your
parents smother you on the first day when the most important thing you need to do is MEET PEOPLE.

I know it sounds silly and you may be asking yourself things like: "But what if people don't like me?" "What if I'm really nervous?" "Shouldn't I unpack everything now?" "What do I say to people to get them to like me?"

To answer that first question, so what? This is the real world. Not everyone likes everyone else. You cannot have grown up and liked everyone you ever met. No one does. What I can tell you is that when I moved to St Andrews, I worried about the same thing, but now I have more close friends than I've ever had and most of them I met at the Uni Hall garden party the afternoon of move in day. Obviously I didn't meet all my friends there. I met a lot through my subjects and through other clubs, societies and through the friends I made in halls.

Second question. "What if I'm really nervous?" I'll let you into a little secret. Everyone is nervous. If they don't look it then they're either incredibly confident or they're hiding it really well. Even if you're nervous and know no one coming into St Andrews or maybe the only person you know isn't here yet or is in another hall, most people are in exactly the same position. I'll tell you one thing though. No one wants to be alone for long and the best way to avoid that is to talk to people. Talk to people at your hall's welcome events. Say hi to people you pass in the corridor. Be friendly to people and people will be friendly back. If you don't know anyone yet by the time it comes to a hall meal, sit down with someone random and introduce yourself. It can be as simple as saying "Is someone sitting here?" and if they say no then sit down and say "Hi, I'm [Your Name]". I lost count of the number of times I said the phrases "Hi I'm Thomas, what's your name?" "Where are you from?" "What are you studying?" "What hall are you in?" You'll say it to everyone, and you'll forget meeting people so will say it to the same people again,eventually it'll stick. Last year I got so mixed up with names I thought
I remembered someone's name or where someone was from and got it completely wrong. 

What about unpacking? Why do I say not to unpack everything straight away? Quite simply because it's a trap. It gets you locked away in your room finding the perfect place for absolutely every single piece of sentimental crap you brought from home. Sorry I don't mean to be mean but everyone brings stuff from home they don't need and never use. I did it, my friends did it and despite being told not to, you will too. But it is a trap. Say you arrive after lunch at Uni Hall this year, and you get moved in and start unpacking, maybe it's 1.30pm at this point. Finally you're all unpacked and everything's where you want it but now it's 5pm and you've missed the entire welcome event and know no one. Now this may be a slight exaggeration but my point stands. Unpacking can wait. Meeting people is the priority.

Now about getting people to like you. Quite simply, don't try. Just be yourself, don't worry about what people thing of you or what was acceptable in high school. You're now at university. It's amazing how quickly everyone grows up and stops being so petty. Yes there will still be the popular groups at uni, it's inevitable but as long as you're yourself then you'll find people that like you for you. I know it sounds far fetched but this summer it's amazing how many times my friends have messaged our groupchats saying "omg I miss you guys so much. I wanna go back to uni". Your friends do become like family because at St Andrews, almost everyone lives away from home so have no relatives in town, and most people have no problem finding likeminded people at uni because there are so many ways to meet people, halls of residence being one of the best.

My general message for moving into halls is this. Send your parents home. Say hi to everyone, even if you're nervous. And above all enjoy it because you won't remember every day at university but you will remember the day you moved in (at least until the alcohol kicks in, then it's a lottery!).